Making Etiquette Easy: Soliciting Donation Money

Image from Paragon Science

Each of us has a cause we love to support, and in many cases we have several causes to support. Because we can be so passionate about those we are helping, it can be hard to draw the line between soliciting donations and abusing our friendships and families for every last dollar. Here are some guidelines to make sure your charity work is charitable for everyone:

• You should almost always feel comfortable approaching family for donations. They are your supports and should be the first resource you turn to. But with distant relatives, try not to reach out to them more than twice a year.
• With friends, you should limit your solicitations to two or three times a year, unless they explicitly state that they want to be more involved in all the work you are doing. You don't want someone to suspect your friendship is obligatory.
• It's okay to send out group emails to your contact list notifying them of opportunities, so long as you protect their email addresses by bcc-ing everyone.
• If you continually are ignored or refused, consider asking the person what causes they support and try to only notify them of similar causes. You should always try to help with opportunities they bring up as well. If you aren't getting anywhere, remove them from your call list.
  

Makinge Etiquette Easy: Wardrobe Intervention

Image from Eric Beard

There are a lot of spoken (and unspoken) rules about what to wear to what kind of events around town. And yes, there is a right and a wrong way to put yourself together, especially for pop-culture events. It's hard to watch our unaware friends or coworkers show up to a wedding in white or a red dress to a funeral. But how do we stop it from happening? It's like a bad wreck and we can't help but look. Here are a few ways to help shelter your friends from realizing they should have done a double-take before leaving the house:

• If you are hosting an event yourself, be sure to specify the dress code on the actual invitation. This way, all guests are given a fair and advance notice of what will be the social norm when they arrive (i.e. "black tie" or "costume party"). You can't be too specific.
• If it isn't your event, call your friend/coworker up beforehand and ask what they plan on wearing to the event. This may give you a window to mention the printed dress code.
  
• If they still aren't getting the memo, volunteer to let them know what you'll be wearing. For example, "I heard it was more formal so we're going to wear black cocktail attire."
• When you get to the actual event, know that you've done all you can do. If they show up out of dress code, try your best to ignore it and have a good time.
  

Making Etiquette Easy: Boss-Employee Friendships

Image from Science Mix

The age-old question of whether or not bosses can be friends with their employees continues to evolve as new mediums of social interaction are established. With a lot of small businesses and even smaller work groups, the lines of obligation v. actual friendship are hard to draw. If you've got employees that you see outside of work frequently, consider the following:

• Stick to your role first: Remember that as a boss, you have to adhere to specific boundaries first and foremost. Because you have more power in the relationship, you must not abuse it for non-work related activities.
• Hierarchy: Since the hierarchy exists, it can be hard sometimes to develop an equal playing field for a friendship. If they happen naturally it's one thing, but don't force it.
• Don't blur the lines: If you begin questioning whether or not your employee likes spending time outside of work with you or not, try to step back and take a break from getting together for non-work related functions.
• Be honest: If you do feel the situation is getting a bit out of hand, talk to your employee(s) about drawing clearer lines between work and play. Let some time pass and only join in only occasionally. It's better to be professional first.
  

Making Etiquette Easy: They Want to Pay

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Let's face it, we can't all afford to dine at five star restaurants each night and travel every weekend to an exotic destination. But chances are, we all have friends who seem to indulge themselves a little more every once and a while. When they offer to pay for us to join in the fun, why is it so hard to accept them paying our way? Before you jump to say 'no' on the next evening out with your jet-setting friends, here are a few things to remember:

• They would be thrilled. People love to share fun things with good company. If they frequently have an over-the-top lifestyle, it certainly isn't belittling to welcome you in on their plans and pay for it. Remember that social offers aren't obligatory, they are for fun.
• A simple thanks will do. If they've made it clear they will be paying for the evening/activity, don't try to pull out your wallet or continuously make comments about how you feel you should be paying. Simply say thank you and remember to send a note.
• Real friends are just that. True friends actually want to spend time with you, and money isn't an issue. Consider it to be their version of hospitality, even if yours looks more like a backyard BBQ.